This week’s guest post is from new mom and debut indie author Azaaa Davis, who will be featured on episode 31 of the podcast. 

I’m sorry but…

  • I don’t drink alcohol anymore. I’m breastfeeding my little one.

  • I don’t go out dancing at night, my family needs me as a wife and mom.

I’m sorry for…

  • ignoring your flirtatious overtures. I’m happily married.

  • not grabbing a drink with you at the bar, my friend. Let’s catch up by email instead.

  • not heading to your place to play board games for hours. I was tempted but my time is so limited.

  • saying “No” to road trips to Atlantic City in NJ and Foxwoods in CT. My days of gambling are over.

  • missing your phone call because it’s my writing night.

  • only responding via text message because my baby is asleep in my arms.

  • choosing to visit family 5 hours away instead of hanging out locally.

I’m sorry and…

  • some of these sacrifices are temporary. My time will open up one day. I hope we’re still friends.


My willingness to make sacrifices to become a novelist was thoroughly put to the test over the past two years.

Here’s what I had to give up to make my author dreams a reality:

  • I quit my full-time job! Now that took many conversations with my husband and a few experiments with our budget.  Giving up the ease and comfort that two incomes can provide, evening willingly, is tough and requires discipline.

  • I gave up my leased car! I decided not to conveniently roll into another lease, because I wasn’t using my car often enough to justify the expense. Instead, I am saving up to buy my next car (preferably a certified used vehicle).

  • I’ve let go of dining out regularly, going on impulsive shopping sprees, and spending all weekend hanging out with friends.

And, here’s what I gained:

  • My time management skills have grown exponentially! I plan ahead and make better use of the small gaps in between daily activities. Instead of getting on social media or reading my email, I use the time that my daughter sleeps and the commute time when my husband drives to write. I use my phone, my laptop or pen and paper to write—whatever is handy at the time!

  • My cooking skills have improved greatly! I like cooking but never really got the hang of baking. Due to living on budget, I have starting baking cookies and cakes instead of buying them. Our snacks and treats are now healthier and last longer. I also have perfected my go-to 30 minutes meals, meaning I spend much less time in the kitchen. Now, our dinners are healthy enough to feed our daughter (once pureed, mashed or cut into tiny pieces), and that saves us money on the occasion store bought baby food as well.

  • I now have a deeper appreciation for the simple pleasures in life. With a baby at home, restaurants and movies are a rare treat for my husband and me. Now, we spend more time talking about philosophy, culture and spiritually. We make the effort to visit family more. We play our strategy board games and host potlucks. On the weekends, we take advantage of daytime, family-friendly activities like nature walks in parks and day trips to explore new towns. We’ve realized that fun doesn’t need to cost our entire paycheck and it doesn’t only happen at night.

What conveniences will you let go of to make room for growth?

On October 1st, 2018, I will be celebrating the completion of a life goal! I will be a published author of a full length fantasy novel, which feels so much better than any shopping spree or restaurant meal ever did.

Feel free to use the first part as a letter to family and friends to help them understand that you are not taking them for granted or ignoring them carelessly. And I hope sharing my experience helps you come to peace with some of the sacrifices you’ve made in pursuit of your goals.


Azaaa Davis is a writer of urban fantasy novels. She debuts with This Time, A Nadira Holden Novel, about demon hunters, family ties and the magic of love. She is working diligently to finish writing more fantasy novels and her next book is expected to be released in early 2019. Thank you for showing an interest in her writing!



Her book:

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